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« 3 Tips to Stay Cool at Work this Summer | Main | Just How Safe Are You? »

June 18, 2008

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Chris

It's important to control your emotions at work both for personal reasons and professional ones. Getting emotional is one of the quickest ways to make that promotion a little bit more difficult to obtain - great blog.

HowToLiveHappily

Acting on your emotions in an inappropriate way can hurt your career, that's why it is important to contain yourself in the heat in the moment. Doing this alone however is not a permanent solution.

In the long term, you have to get to the root cause of your strong emotions and take care of it.

A few things to remember:

Having emotions is natural. While most of us have been taught that emotions are "stupid", "shameful", "egotistic", "weak" - or any other flavor of "wrong", this kind of attitude is severely misguided.

While the situation at hand may require that you conceal your emotions, and while people around you may erroneously give you a harsh treatment, make sure to not beat yourself up for having emotions. Accept yourself for the human being you are.

When addressing the situation that triggered your emotions, use "I"-statements rather than "You"-statements. Here's an example:

Wrong: You always do XYZ. (A personal attack that will most probably get the other person defensive. This will lead to a fight and will worsen the problem)

Right: You just did X, from which I get the impression that Y. This makes me feel Z. Could you please do ABC instead?

It takes some practice to learn talking like this. The culture in this company may be toxic, and finding another company may be the right thing to do.

The article above mentions the so called "hot buttons".

These are emotional issues you may be having, that have been caused by traumatizing experiences. Most of us have them, and there's no need to be ashamed of them.

You owe it to yourself to take the time and work for healing yourself. Get all the help you need.

If you don't, your hot buttons will push you to act in hurtful ways - and traumatize the people around you. Trying to control yourself with will power is not a solution. Make a point of HEALING yourself.

Good luck!

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